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Lust

When men and women were mere prototypes and God was playing around with them (a bit like the winemakers at Penfolds do with their experimental reds and whites), He decided to connect the frontal lobes of our brains directly to our olfactory bulb. The olfactory bulb, or organ as it sometimes called, is that bit of equipment behind your nose and between your eyes that processes smells. Its tiny receptors sort of dangle down into your retro-nasal passage and pick up the aromas that pass that way either during in- or exhalation. This is how we smell.

This information is then fed straight into our frontal lobes, which are the parts of our brain that do all the hard mental work. No other electro-chemical information is processed as directly or as quickly as smell; smells all have VIP passes backstage, no questions asked. This connection, incidentally, suggests something important about how we came to perceive our surroundings: through our sense of smell we came to understand the world. Indeed, from an evolutionary point of view, our olfactory bulb could be said to have helped develop our frontal lobes' size and sharpness. And it's in our frontal lobes that the emotional part of our brain also resides, so it's no wonder smells can trigger off such powerful memories. Like love and sex and lust and desire and heartbreak and rejection...

With a certain air of fascinating mystery, the smells of wine (of which there are myriad, and all generated by the combination of hundreds of organic compounds that reside in every single glass) help unlock these desires, feelings, and all-too natural urges. Descriptors such as earth and hay, game, briar, blackberry, nettles, bacon, bay leaf, nutmeg, and cinnamon might not read like some sort of erotic story, but when coupled with the physiological and psychological effects of alcohol they can turn the short, wide and mousy blond accounts girl into Cindy Crawford. And it doesn't necessarily take big buck wines to do it.

Of course much of this potential attraction depends on the chemical messages flying between you and Cindy. These little chemical signals are called pheromones: they're the external equivalent of hormones - the chemical messages that bounce around on the inside of your body.

Pheromones travel by air or water, and they serve to attract members of the same species, or to deter or even frighten them away ... Recent research and unfounded marketing hype in the US has suggested that the pheromones in certain grape varieties - particularly pinot noir - are remarkably similar to some human sex pheromones. All those smells you get in the pinot noir grape - spices, earth, musk and the slightly feral, barnyard notes - are very similar smells to those associated with the principal male smell, androstenone. Truffles and the sort of oaky smells in so much wine fermented or matured in new oak barrels are similarly androstenone-like. Can this explain the world-wide love affair for heavily oaked wine? Is Roxburgh Chardonnay like wine porn - all cleavage and lipstick and a loose adductor muscle? Is this why cabernet sauvignon became so popular all around the world in the opulent 80s - because it was full of that gradually rotting vanilla/wood odor? Talk about going back to the primordial swamp... But whilst androstenone is the key male smell (women produce it in tinier amounts), what about the female, or girl smell, as we say in these times of greater gender equality?

According to the seminal work conducted on human olfaction by American doctor, the appropriately surnamed John Amoore, the key female smells are thiethylamine and isovaleric acid; these are characterized by fish and cheese odors respectively... Fishy smells are a bit tricky to find in wine, it must be said, but Australia's randiest wine-making doctor, Max Lake, has suggested that isovaleric acid can be simulated in sparkling wine - and Champagne in particular - and soft cheeses.

Of course, what all this science and olfaction hocus-pocus does is prove what folklore and tradition have known for years: Champagne and fantastic Burgundy gets you on a sure thing; and if it wasn't for wine and all those pheremonic characters bursting out of the glass, we wouldn't be here. Sex would remain the deed of darkness committed between mere brutes. Sober brutes, it must be said, but brutes nevertheless. back to top

Men, women and drunken rude stuff... Ben

Canaider explains how wine's powerful smells

can bring men and women together and turn the dull stocky accounts girl into Cindy Crawford.

Men and women get together for some pretty odd reasons. This is why God, Allah and Buddha got together and invented wine; they knew that nothing else besides this powerful elixir would help keep bringing the two sexes together. In this sense, if it wasn't for wine, we wouldn't be here; apes or ants or something really would rule the earth.

Wine has this power for two reasons. One is to do with alcohol, as you would expect; but the other is more concerned with smell, and this is the more fundamental reason behind the whole men and women and wine and sex equation. To understand this more completely, we need to go back to the primordial swamp, or as Catholics call it, the Garden of Eden. read more

This authentic Cantonese version of chow mein features fresh egg noodles, which are fried into a cake that softens slightly when topped with a meat and vegetable sauce. Be careful not to mistake wonton noodles for Chinese egg noodles — although they look similar, wonton noodles don't have the same rich texture.

8 oz fresh thin Chinese egg noodles* (also called Hong Kong noodles; not wonton noodles)

1 (1/2-lb) piece flank steak

1/4 teaspoon sugar

1/4 teaspoon Asian sesame oil

2 tablespoons soy sauce

2 tablespoons Chinese rice wine (preferably Shaoxing) or medium-dry Sherry

2 tablespoons oyster sauce*

2 teaspoons cornstarch

1/4 teaspoon white pepper

1/2 cup reduced-sodium chicken broth

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons peanut or vegetable oil

1 teaspoon finely chopped peeled fresh ginger

1 teaspoon finely chopped garlic

3 scallions, cut into 2 1/2-inch pieces (1 cup)

5 oz fresh shiitake mushrooms, stems discarded and caps quartered (2 1/2 cups)

6 oz choy sum, cut into 2 1/2-inch pieces (2 1/2 cups) or 1-inch-wide broccoli florets

Special equipment: a well-seasoned 14-inch wok (preferably flat-bottomed) read more

Chow Mein

Cook pasta in large pot of boiling salted water until tender but still firm to bite, stirring occasionally. Drain, reserving Bring 8 cups unsalted water to a boil in a 6- to 8-quart pot, then add noodles, stirring to separate, and cook 15 seconds. Drain in a colander and rinse under cold water until noodles are cool, then shake colander briskly to drain excess water.

Cut steak with the grain into 1 1/2- to 2-inch-wide strips. Cut each strip across the grain into 1/4-inch-thick slices and put in a medium bowl. Using your hands, toss beef with sugar, sesame oil, 1 tablespoon soy sauce, 1 tablespoon rice wine, 1 tablespoon oyster sauce, and 1 teaspoon cornstarch. Let beef marinate at room temperature while preparing remaining ingredients.

Stir together remaining 1 tablespoon soy sauce, 1 tablespoon rice wine, 1 tablespoon oyster sauce, and 1 teaspoon cornstarch with 1/4 teaspoon white pepper in a small bowl until smooth, then stir in chicken broth.

Heat wok over high heat until a drop of water evaporates within 1 to 2 seconds of contact, then add 1/2 cup peanut oil and heat until just smoking. Carefully add noodles all at once, flattening top to form a 9-inch cake. Cook until underside is golden, 4 to 5 minutes, rotating noodle cake with a metal spatula to brown evenly and lifting edges occasionally to check color. Carefully flip noodle cake over with spatula and tongs, then cook, rotating cake, until other side is golden, 2 to 3 minutes more. Transfer noodle cake to a large paper-towel-lined plate to drain excess oil. Discard any oil remaining in wok and wipe out wok with paper towels.

Transfer drained noodle cake to a platter and loosely cover with foil to keep warm.

Heat wok over high heat until a drop of water evaporates within 1 to 2 seconds of contact. Pour 1 tablespoon peanut oil down side of wok, then swirl oil, tilting wok to coat sides. Add beef, spreading pieces in 1 layer on bottom and sides as quickly as possible. Cook, undisturbed, letting beef begin to brown, 1 minute, then stir-fry until meat is just browned on all sides but still pink in center, about 1 minute. Transfer meat and any juices to a plate.

Add 1 tablespoon oil to wok over high heat. When oil just begins to smoke, add ginger and garlic and stir-fry 5 seconds, then add scallions and stir-fry 30 seconds. Add mushrooms and stir-fry until softened, about 3 minutes. Add choy sum and stir-fry until leaves are bright green and just wilted, 2 to 3 minutes (if using broccoli, cook until almost crisp-tender). Stir broth mixture, then pour into wok and stir-fry until sauce is slightly thickened, about 2 minutes. Add beef and stir to coat. Return mixture just to a boil, then pour over noodle cake. back to top

CHAI BUBBLE CHIC

Chai, a modern take on an antique tea, has recently been discovered by all the haute coffeehouses across America. Although it's existed globally for thousands of years, it's only been easy to find here in the states for the past seven or so.

In the early to mid 90s, several U.S.-based chai concentrate manufacturers began marketing their concoctions, and chai lattes became the rage in a few cafes around the country. Those serving it believed chai would become an integral part of a growing consumption of tea in the U.S. But acceptance of chai into the American cafe scene has been slow. Even though U.S. tea consumption rose eight percent last year, many market analysts chalk chai's slow growth to the decrease in coffee consumption among Americans. See, the majority of American cafes serve chai more like a latte than like a cup of tea. Thus, chai competes more for the everyday coffee drinker than it does for the tea sipper. read more

What is Chai?

In India, the birthplace of chai, the word "chai" simply means "tea." Here in the U.S. though, chai refers to a specific, and oft-overlooked and undermarketed, coffeehouse cup... a pumpkiny-cinnamony-spicy tea-based concoction that competes with every other fu-fu coffee drink. And we've latched onto only one of the many different types of chai prepared in India -- masala chai -- adhering to a southern Indian, British-style service method of incorporating milk into the mix.

So the chai we drink here, hot or cold, tends to be in the form of a chai latte, infused with spices we commonly consume in pumpkin pie -- cinnamon, cardamom, nutmeg, vanilla and star anise. For the hot version, milk (whether whole, skim, rice or soy) is steamed at the espresso machine and added to the concentrate; for the cold one, straight milk is incorporated and the drink served over ice. An iced chai latte might also take a few whirls in a blender. Regardless how it's served, the comparisons to pumpkin pie in a cup are uncanny.

Chew on This!

There's a new tea trend threatening to overtake chai on the popularity charts. Hipsters on both coasts have been spotted sipping "boba" tea at local tea bars. Sometimes called "pearls" or "bubbles" (all slang references to women's breasts in Chinese), boba's a Chinese beverage that's squishing its way into the mainstream. Although there are many variations, it's primarily made by combining black, marble-sized tapioca balls with a variety of tea- or fruit-based drinks, most of them milky. The concoction is then combined with ice, shaken (often in the ever-trendy martini shaker) and served topped with a dollop of the tapioca pearls. The drink's then sucked -- milkshake style -- through extra wide, colorful straws. back to top